Outsmart Chaos 099: The Small Offering
Connection: The lesson my mother teaches
Chaos fractures relationships—not just through conflict but through neglect. The drift is slow: a missed call here, a brush-off there, a week when no one asks how you’re doing.
Restoring relationships doesn’t always require a grand gesture. Often, the smallest offerings carry the most significant weight.
A Not So Quiet Legacy
Growing up, my mom embarrassed me constantly.
She’d talk to strangers in the checkout line. Compliment someone’s shirt at the gas station. Pet a stranger’s dog to start up a conversation. As a kid, I hated it. I’d roll my eyes, hide behind cereal boxes, and beg her to “just be normal.”
But now, as an adult, I get it. And I embarrass my kids in the same way.
In this small area, I’ve become her. I make jokes loud enough for someone behind me to hear and smirk. I connect with others over coffee – just getting to know new friends. I make an effort to make the cashier or barista smile.
Why?
I now understand that connections aren’t built only on deep conversations and long histories. They’re also built on the smallest decisions to see someone.
We want to feel seen, heard, and valued.
Relationships Are Daily
We tend to think relationships are either broken or whole.
But they’re alive…shaped and reshaped by small choices. Micro-moments.
• A smile across the room.
• A two-sentence check-in.
• A quick word of appreciation.
These aren’t throwaway gestures. They are seeds.
The healthiest relationships are built on a steady rhythm of small, intentional offerings. Not because they’re owed but because they’re needed. Small signs of care compound over time into something deeply human: trust.
The Power of Presence
Most people aren’t craving status or things. They’re craving to feel known. To feel like their existence has registered somewhere—like they matter in someone’s day.
Being others-focused is a quiet strength, especially in leadership, where it’s easy to retreat into task lists, dashboards, and deliverables.
But small offerings shift culture. They cut through stress. They remind others that, beyond our roles, we’re still people.
Presence is more than showing up. It’s showing care when you arrive.
Everyday Leadership
Small offerings work in friendships. But they’re crucial in leadership.
A manager who notices someone’s frustration and makes space to listen—without solving it.
A leader who asks, “How’s your energy this week?”—and genuinely means it.
These moments improve morale, build connection cultures, and tell the team, "You are seen."
Here’s what you can do:
• Start your meetings with a 60-second human check-in.
• Make one intentional compliment daily.
• Catch someone doing something right—and tell them.
These aren’t soft skills. They’re culture-shaping habits.
Relationship Challenge
What’s one relationship you’ve let drift?
What’s one small offering you could give today?
A short text. A word of thanks. A moment of listening.
It won’t solve everything. But it’s a start. And that’s what most relationships are waiting for.
Onward
You don’t need to fix everything today.
Just offer something real.
· The joke that gets a laugh.
· The question that invites openness.
· The compliment that lifts.
The smallest acts—done with intention—can be the biggest signals of care.
Your smallest act might be the only light someone sees today. Use it well.
When asked, "What one thing do you want to be remembered for?" I respond, " If I am remembered for only one thing, it is that I made someone smile."
After twenty years, a high school classmate happened to cross paths with me. She said, "I knew you immediately because of your smile." That meant the world to me.
I am glad that my actions have impact on others in a positive way.
There is nothing more special in a day than to recognize something special in a "stranger" and see them walk away with a smile on their face.